NORINA MILLER

Dear Family and Friends,

We have set the date of Sunday, October 23 for Norina’s memorial. The location and time are still to be determined. We look forward to as many of you as possible joining us on that day, and hope it might be possible even for some of you who live a distance away. We can already feel how valuable it will be to gather and remember Norina together.

We continue to feel both touched and supported by every single card, call, visit, message, song, meal, treat, memory, flower, logistical aid, hug, and kind word.  We’re deeply grateful to all of you for holding us in your hearts and helping carry us as we begin to transition back into our lives, adjusting them to this tremendous loss. It helps to know you are with us remembering, cherishing, missing, and ever-grateful for our lives and loves.

At 7 o’clock this morning, our beloved Norina took her last breaths of this lifetime.  Her dad and I were both with her, holding her.  I recited Meher Baba’s O Parvardigar and Beloved God prayers as she took her last breaths.  Her brother and sister-in-law have come to be with her and offer the Jewish prayers of passing.  It is very peaceful in Norina’s room and our house.

We haven’t made any plans yet for a memorial.  It won’t happen for a little while. We’ll make a posting here when we have a plan to share.

We send out love to all of you, as I know deeply in my heart that Norina would be asking me to send her love.

~Terra

All continues to be very quiet and peaceful here.  Norina is calm and seems quite comfortable.  This afternoon and evening she has been responsive again in small ways.  At one point this afternoon, when Jeff felt she was perhaps not asleep and was seeing and hearing him, he asked her, “How are you?” and Norina turned her hand slightly into a thumbs-up position.  Several times today, when I’ve told her I love her, followed by “Jai Baba” her lips have moved to form the words back.  (The meaning is roughly: “praise Baba.”  Some Meher Baba followers say this phrase to one another very frequently, some occasionally, and some not at all.)

This evening Norina gave a little wave to Ayla when she entered the room, and she’s been helping us know how to help her be more comfortable with slight indications to where adjustments of her bedding and such are needed.  It’s been very sweet being in this two-way communication again, even though minimally.

We feel the support, prayers, and love of family and friends from all over pouring into our home and are profoundly grateful.

~Terra

Norina is sleeping very peacefully. As of last night, she isn’t waking up anymore, but is staying asleep now. We knew this stage would be coming, but it’s taken the night for it to sink in, for me to get used to it.

I spent the sweetest, most peaceful night on the cot right next to her holding her hand and dozing a little bit while she slept so soundly. There’s a small fig tree outside the west-facing window in Norina’s bedroom.  In the middle of the night, the full moon shone through the fig leaves and lit the silhouette of her sleeping face with a thin, delicate line of light in the soft, dark room.  It was an indescribably beautiful scene that I will never forget. I am profoundly grateful for these gifts.

I just added yet-another page to this site – a Guest Book, of sorts.  Thank you for being here with us, all of you very dear family and friends.

~Terra

I’m sitting with Norina in her room right now while she is sleeping very soundly.  She stayed awake and had quiet visits with a number of friends and family members throughout the afternoon, and became very tired as the last visitors were saying goodbye.

Norina has been more tired and much quieter – speaking almost not at all – for the past three days.  She answers our questions with one word, or a nod, or a squeeze of the hand.  I asked her if it is hard for her to find the words, or if she has the words and is too tired to say them out loud.  She indicated that it’s the latter, that she is listening and tracking on what’s happening around her, but is too tired now to speak aloud.  Sitting with her quietly as she rests is a very sweet, very peaceful experience.  Sometimes we can sense that she’s working to stay awake and be with us, so we try to assure her that resting is good, that we all understand how important it is for her to have good rest.

I wrote the above a few hours ago, but hadn’t hit the ‘Publish’ button.  Norina is even more quiet and sleepy tonight than she was earlier today.  We’re having a lovely, calm evening here.  Dale has been playing guitar softly in Norina’s room as she rests.  We may need the house to stay quieter tomorrow than it has been these past two weeks.  I think it would be a good idea to call us first before planning to come over.  Thanks for your understanding, and for all the continued love and support that has flooded Norina and all of us continuously over these past days.  It’s been an amazing gift – you all are amazing gifts.

A couple of days ago was the last time I asked Norina if she had a message to post. She nodded yes, but then was too tired to say much.  This is the message she asked me to post:

“I love you”

-Terra

Hello everyone~

For those of you who haven’t been along for the ride with Norina all the way back since 2005/06, I finally found a few minutes to finish writing up the background, to the best of my recollection.  If interested, you may read it on “The (Mostly) Medical Background” page.  Apologies for the length.  I tried to keep it brief. Five and a half years is a long time, and keeping things brief has definitely never been my strong suit.

I asked Norina if she’d like to dictate a post this morning, and she nodded yes. There was a thinking pause, then something came up and the morning routine played itself out, and before we had the chance to get back to it, the moment of opportunity had passed by.  Norina’s napping now.  She and I spent some time reading cards and messages, watching a video of Cole’s new kitten in Portland, and looking at a lovely framed picture of her second grade Peninsula class on a camping trip.  We both really enjoyed looking at the picture for a nice long time, remembering each person in it.

It’s beautiful here today.  Norina had a quiet night and it’s been a good day so far.  I’ll write more soon.  Until then, we all send our love,

Terra

PS  I’m thinking it would be a good idea to adjust the visiting times.  Let’s try 1-4 pm for a while.  Make no mistake, though, we love seeing and hearing from you all, so please don’t feel you need to stay away – we just need a little bit of extra time for catching up with everything else!  xoxo

Hello friends ~

This morning Norina asked me to write the posting.  She’s having a massage at the moment with Natasha Dedrick, who came down with her bike on the train from San Francisco.  Norina and I have both loved having occasional sessions up in San Francisco with Natasha over the past few months, and she’s very sweetly agreed to make the trip down to us when it will fit into her schedule.  Natasha is a very talented body worker, and an intelligent, generous, funny, wise and gentle young woman.  We love it when her bike pulls into the driveway.

It’s been a good weekend so far.  Norina’s energy and strength have been good.  Yesterday morning she joined us in the kitchen and helped prepare a bowl of summer fruits for a rare intimate family breakfast (only the nine of us!).  The petite-sized wheelchair provided by the hospice organization has been very convienient for getting around our tight floor plan, and for visits on the front and back patios.  With assistance, Norina walks to and from the bathroom next to her bedroom, and she uses the chair for longer treks.

We’ve had wonderful visits from dear friends and family, some of whom have travelled long distances to be here.  We’ve also bid farewell to dear ones who have had to head back to their homes and jobs.  It’s hard to say good bye, but so sweet to have had time together that we all feel happy and grateful, overall.

We’ve been reading cards, notes, and messages bit by bit.  It’s a rather slow process, as Norina likes to take some time to think about each one as they’re read aloud.  Please know that all messages, calls and visits are cherished, even if not responded to or reciprocated.  We all feel the love pouring in with every message and visit, and even during those rare moments when the house is still ~ perhaps especially then.  I hope you feel the love from here pouring back to you.

~Terra

We’ve been hearing from and seeing so many wonderful friends from way back, as well as those in Norina’s and our family’s more current circle.  The past reconnections have been such a gift for all of us, and for Norina particularly.  It’s so sweet that people have been reaching across the distances of time and geography.  I’ve noticed that Norina seems to especially love to hear about what’s up in her friends’ lives, particularly all things fun and funny.  She and I want to post the recounting of a very funny story we heard in India a few years back.  I’ll try to get that on here later on today.

Norina just finished a delicious big breakfast sitting at the dining room table (in the wheelchair).  It’s a lovely morning here already.

Thanks so much for all of the very, very sweet messages – the outpouring from all of you has meant the world to all of us.

love to all of you out there,

Terra

This posting was dictated to me (Terra) by Norina this morning over breakfast in bed:

Thank you, Thursday.  Let’s keep it real, nice and cheesy: jsyk (just so you know)

It’s been awesome to have unexpected visitors and get unexpected calls. Something cool happened yesterday. – we had a bluegrass jam.  Ayla made baklava muffins.  Wish you were all here.  Love you!!!

This morning I (Terra) asked Norina if she wanted to dictate a posting for this website, and she liked the idea.  Mike typed up the message below as the two of them overheard Lee & Cole’s conversation over breakfast in the next room.

Livin’ Today

Hi folks, thank you for your responses to this website that Emilly so sweetly put together. I’ve been feeling pretty okay lately. It’s been awesome to hear from old friends, and receive so many surprise visitors. Bonus update: my brothers are thinking about exploding cocktails in the kitchen, come on over!